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Batman v Superman Review UPDATED for ULTIMATE EDITION

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While our review still stands below, after watching the Ultimate Edition (now available on streaming platforms) we've changed our mind ever so slightly. The Ultimate Edition, featuring 30 minutes of new footage goes a long way to repairing the damage that the original theatrical cut caused. The gaping plot holes, continuity issues and character development, while not fixed completely are certainly explored alot more. Sure, the extra 30 minutes of footage are blink and you'll miss them, however, they do enough. Yes, the movie is still a mess and a huge missed opportunity, but what was once a diabolical incoherent mess, is now just a very watchable mess. This is what should have been released in cinemas!

Batman v Superman Ultimate Edition 



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Batman v Superman. The two most iconic comic book characters of all time finally hit the big screen. The stuff dreams are made of. Or should be made of, at least. As much as it pains me to say it, this is the stuff nightmares are made of.

Zack Snyder's latest big screen offering sees Batman going up against the most recent blow in to Gotham's neighbouring Metropolis, Superman, or as Bruce Wayne describes him, "An Alien that could burn the whole place down". Having witnessed first hand the total destruction caused by Superman and General Zod, Batman decides once and for all to do something about the caped clad alien. While on the other side of town,  Clarke Kent and his alter ego take issue with a vigilante thundering around branding people. Lex Luthor (Jesse Eisenberg) manages to weasel his way into things and besides creating a cave troll from Lord of the Rings, also known as Doomsday, he manages to get Bats and Supes to square off against each other. 

I've been a fan of Zack Snyder for quite some time and I'll continue to be a Snyder fan, but he absolutely has to hold his hand up here and shoulder the blame for this complete shambles of a movie. Originally slated for a Summer 2015 release, the movie was given extra time to ensure the filmmakers had "time to realize fully their vision, given the complex visual nature of the story"
Who knows what kind of catastrophic movie they had nearly 12 months ago.

A plot filled with more holes than you'd find in a golf course, Batman v Superman is teeing up to be the biggest disappointment of 2016. And that saddens me greatly. This should have been something epic. It should have been a masterpiece. Two cultural icons going toe to toe. Our jaws should have been blown off. I really wanted this to be phenomenal. 

Whatever about the second hour and a half, the first hour or so is an absolute clusterfuck of the highest order. Scene after scene are just hammered onto the screen with zero flow, jumping all over the place. The nightmare sequence alone is a prime example of this. So much so, that the first hour makes very little sense and is a jarring experience. Did they run out of money for an editor? Did a blind chimpanzee break into the edit suite and somehow managed to cut the theatrical print? And while you can argue "You're being a fucking nerd / geek" it doesn't hold any water. No matter what we you spin it, the first hour of Batman v Superman is a disgrace to film editing. It's outrageous that a director at Snyder's level, let alone a bunch of studio execs and fuck knows who else could approve this first hour.  



Tragically things go from bad to worse. While Jesse Eisenberg is a talented actor generally, he seemed to get no direction or guidance as his portrayal of Lex Luthor is incredibly unbalanced. It's all over the place as he tries multiple personas to fit Luthor. Regardless, it's the worst thing that Eisenberg has ever done and the more the movie rolls on the more unbearable it gets. 
Henry Cavill's Superman is nothing but a dick. An arrogant, self indulgent, DICK, with even less personality and presence than Man of Steel. It's like he's completely unraveled Superman to the point where one of the most inspiring and likeable pop culture characters of all time, is now the most unlikeable. On the other hand Ben Affleck manages to single handily keep this $250 Million shambles from completely falling apart. 

His physical take on the role is impressive. This is a bulkier Batman than we've seen before. He moves slower, but more methodically. Even Bruce Wayne, is an impressive looking individual. Comic book fans will see the obvious Frank Miller nods, but Affleck manages to channel a look that is almost more familiar to Alex Ross fans, than Miller. Either way, it's a good look and his performance is decent. Especially when he's Batman. Which tragically isn't that often. Even the Batmobile is limited in it's usage which is a shame, as it does look pretty damn epic.
The supporting cast including Jeremy Irons, Amy Adams and Gal Gadot are adequate, although nobody is breaking a sweat here. Safe to say Affleck is the best thing about this movie.

Once the second half gets going with the main event and subsequently cliched cave troll fight, the movie starts finding it's feet. However, audiences may have also found their feet and left by this time. And they can't be blamed for doing that after a horrendous first hour. When Bats and Supes finally go at it, it's a bit of an anticlimax though and it all seems to be over quite quickly. In fact, it seems a little rushed and pointless, given the movie has hung it's hat on these two icons going at it. However, it's still entertaining to watch and at times has it's tongue firmly planted in it's cheek. And as great as it is to watch Batman, Superman and Wonder Woman fight a cave troll, it's another jarring experience. The CG used for Doomsday is quite poor and does a good job of being completely unconvincing. Maybe most of the visual effects budget went on the 500 billion forks of orange lightning that seem to fill the screen at any given moment. 

Then however, the movie pulls a punch that most people won't see coming. And it's a helluva punch. In fact it's a big gamble in what happens and it will genuinely stun most people into complete shock and silence. 

Overall though, Batman v Superman is incredibly disappointing. Originally, the biggest worry with this movie was crowbarring in the likes of Cyborg, Flash and Aquaman. In reality, it's the least of the problems. In fact, these characters are nothing more than an after thought, being relegated to a mere montage that would have been absolutely perfect for a post credits sequence (and there's none by the way). 
Yes, one could make the point of switching off one's brain and not overthinking this, but with the bad outweighing the good ten fold, it's impossible not to. While the scene of Bruce Wayne running through a crumbling Gotham and a short lived fight of the century are great to watch, a few choice set pieces alone cannot save a movie. How they managed to get something like this so wrong is beyond comprehension. 





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The Movie Bit: Batman v Superman Review UPDATED for ULTIMATE EDITION
Batman v Superman Review UPDATED for ULTIMATE EDITION
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